28
Mar 2017

 

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Mmmm tutes. Universally hated, only attended to meet the minimum attendance requirement, a.k.a student jail.

 

1. “Hi, my name is….”

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This dreaded, baptism by fire is part of every. single. tute. ever. Even, if you’re a 4th year. The combination will vary, but the basic run down is name, what you’re studying (Law, duh. But you might be doing a double), something you did over the summer, why you’re studying what you’re studying and an interesting fact about you. I suggest you prepare your answer now. You don’t need to write it down, that’s a bit try-hard, but have a general idea of what you’re going to say. I once had a tutor ask, “What crime would you like committed against you and how would you like to die?”. I doubt you’ll be so lucky.

 

2. “I’m studying law because I want to be rich.”

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Don’t be that person. You’ll avoid years of mockery and people placing bets on how long you’ll last. You can think it, but don’t say it.

 

3. “I’m studying law because I really love Suits/How to Get Away with Murder/Rake/Ally McBeal.”

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Again, you can think it…however, it’s usually admitted to select confidants in the confessional, aka, at the Tav.

 

4. “I’m studying law because my mum/dad is a lawyer.”

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Don’t be that person either. Although, when that person appears (and they will), find out what kind of lawyer their parent is. If they’re in an area of law you might be interested in, well…they might not be the worst people to know. Hello, internship!

 

5. The eternal struggle of prep. 

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There are those who rock up with the most perfect and pristine notes that look like they should be on display at the Met in New York. My notes look more like something that belongs in the Guggenheim with the other abstract artists. General rule of thumb is for every hour in the classroom, spend 2 hours in the library. Do your best, but don’t fret over a 1-hour tutorial. It’s better to rock up well-rested, learn and ask intelligent questions, instead of falling asleep and drooling on your perfect notes. It’s a skill that takes time to learn.

 

6. That person who shows up with nothing.

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I’m talking no pen, no paper, no notes, no book, no laptop, nothing. They’re usually the type who don’t shower, wash their clothes or get a haircut but expects to copy off you. Do not bust your well-groomed arse for them. Tell them to get their shit together. It’s law school, not kindy. That being said, if you think they are actually struggling with the pressure, a supportive smile and asking them how they're going, can make a huge difference. We're all in this together. Except for the lazies. They're on their own.

 

7. Only the brave remain.

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Tutorials are sort of like Survivor. Every week there is a challenge and at the end someone will be going home. There will even be a wildcard week, where previous Survivors come back for one last shot at glory. That week, is called Revision Week. Like lectures, it’s easy to fall out of the habit of going, but consistently going and doing the prep is way more likely to get you pretty grades.

  

8. The Hermione.

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God love Hermione but in every tute there is one. Sometimes there will be two but one will usually win over the other. Now, they can be annoying as fuck, but they’re usually desperate to be liked and to learn. Befriend them. Worked out pretty well for Bloody-hell Weasley and Someone-is-trying-to-kill-me Potter. P.S. Hermiones can be either gender, so don't just single out the chicks.

 

9. Mature age students.

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Most mature-age students are great. They’re funny, motivated, really good at keeping it real and just generally nice people. So much so that you don’t even notice they’re mature age. Then, there are others. They ask super long winded questions, tell really long and boring stories about a “similar” thing that happened to them and question the lecturer/tutor’s knowledge (because they’re not experts or anything…).

Admittedly, I still don’t know what to do about them besides glare, pretend I’m a witch and cast imaginary curses on them. Sorry, that’s the best I’ve got. But, nothing stopping you from giving it a go.

 

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